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Just stuff....
Nov. 8th, 2009 06:18 amWell, obviously the big thing this week is the PUP. Gods... how can something so amazing and so beautiful be so completely fuckin scary? I'm sure this feeling will get better as time goes by and I get my brain around it, but here I am at day 3 of knowing there's this growing thing inside me and it is still so surreal. I keep pinching myself, and I'm still not dreaming... My mom says I'm overthinking it, and if I don't stop my panic disorder will send me to the hospital. So here's me, chewing my nails and worrying but trying not to LOL.
I want to get back to writing soon. I can't take much more of being totally immersed in baby-land. I want to work on Shuffle, I'm not quite sure how to move forward though. I've gotten Miroku and Rin out of the house, Sango thinks they are going to Japan but really they went 2 hours away to this place Miroku used to visit when he was a kid. He's filed for divorce, just about disowned Izumi... handed his wedding band to Sango before he left with Rin... I had something written where InuYasha calls him bright and early the next morning and is giving him shit about leaving Sango in the middle of the night because Kagome went over there to comfort her leaving him alone at his house... I haven't looked at that in a while though, cuz I was trying to finish Dolls and then I had those 2 good one shots come out, Take Me With You and Rainy Day.
But just because I haven't been writing my Mir/Rin smut doesn't mean I haven't been writing at all... I have been writing a journal to the Pup (gods does this make me one of *those* moms??) So I am talking to... IT, and telling IT everything about these first few days, little details I feel I'm likely to forget... I don't know how important some things are that I've written down, but I will at least be able to look back and remember everything.
Todays errant thought: I will probably have a girl because I write lolicon and the gods want me to know the pain of thinking a 17-19 yr old boy would want to touch my very young daughter in a bad way. However, I'm sure the gods know what I write is fiction and I would NEVER endorse such a relationship if it were reality. Besides that, Me and Osiris are tight, I don't think he'd let anything like that happen to my kid. Yeah I consider my gods to be the Egyptian ones, yes I have made offerings, yes I bear the mark of the Eye of Ra over my heart and I know the Egyptian star patterns and make it a point to try and visually see Osiris when I can (Orion is the same constellation, but there are others up there, like the two crowns of Egypt and the sphinx)
I'm rambling. And its way too early to be up. I think I'll go back to bed for a while.
I want to get back to writing soon. I can't take much more of being totally immersed in baby-land. I want to work on Shuffle, I'm not quite sure how to move forward though. I've gotten Miroku and Rin out of the house, Sango thinks they are going to Japan but really they went 2 hours away to this place Miroku used to visit when he was a kid. He's filed for divorce, just about disowned Izumi... handed his wedding band to Sango before he left with Rin... I had something written where InuYasha calls him bright and early the next morning and is giving him shit about leaving Sango in the middle of the night because Kagome went over there to comfort her leaving him alone at his house... I haven't looked at that in a while though, cuz I was trying to finish Dolls and then I had those 2 good one shots come out, Take Me With You and Rainy Day.
But just because I haven't been writing my Mir/Rin smut doesn't mean I haven't been writing at all... I have been writing a journal to the Pup (gods does this make me one of *those* moms??) So I am talking to... IT, and telling IT everything about these first few days, little details I feel I'm likely to forget... I don't know how important some things are that I've written down, but I will at least be able to look back and remember everything.
Todays errant thought: I will probably have a girl because I write lolicon and the gods want me to know the pain of thinking a 17-19 yr old boy would want to touch my very young daughter in a bad way. However, I'm sure the gods know what I write is fiction and I would NEVER endorse such a relationship if it were reality. Besides that, Me and Osiris are tight, I don't think he'd let anything like that happen to my kid. Yeah I consider my gods to be the Egyptian ones, yes I have made offerings, yes I bear the mark of the Eye of Ra over my heart and I know the Egyptian star patterns and make it a point to try and visually see Osiris when I can (Orion is the same constellation, but there are others up there, like the two crowns of Egypt and the sphinx)
I'm rambling. And its way too early to be up. I think I'll go back to bed for a while.
